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Free Support! Cooomme and Get it!

Do you ever see those “super annoying” posts from your friends in your newsfeed all “Buy this, buy that!”, “Check this out!”, “Look how awesome I’m being by doing this!”?? Can you believe that they have the nerve to interrupt literally [maybe] a single minute of our day to try and promote something they enjoy??

How dare they.

As you may have noticed as of late, I am also one of those people. You know why? Because support is free. Because I enjoy supporting people doing things they love. I enjoy supporting the people who have the ability (and sometimes it takes courage) to be consistent about it. We don’t take joy in feeling like we are being “those people“. We are just here to share our hobbies/jobs/sources of income in hopes that we will get support from our family and friends. If you’re not about it, scroll by, move along. There’s no need to be rude, or laugh, or make snide remarks at us/them. (On the other hand, I know there are some consistently pushy, send invites to your inbox, texting, calling, messaging, kind of people, just ignore them or kindly say “No thanks, I’m not interested”.) If they ask you for their support, and you don’t want to, just say I’d rather keep my [insert social platform here], free of ‘advertisement’ but if there’s another way I can help, let me know.”, leave the group, or turn off notifications for said person.

I’m not here to shame those who don’t enjoy seeing things they aren’t necessarily thrilled about in their feeds. I’m just saying the mockery isn’t necessary.

If you can’t say anything nice- don’t say nothin’ at all.

I appreciate the support you all have shown me! Whether it is from sharing, to following or subscribing, or simply just visiting my page when I post. So thank you, thank you, thank you, for your support! NOW onto other things…

Below is a list of people I know and love who have businesses or hobbies that I support, or are looking for support. Check them out! You may discover something you never thought you needed!

Are you looking into bettering your lifestyle and have good gut health? Check out Plexus, sold by none other than my amazing sister in law, Nicole. Her Facebook group is Pink Power.

Looking for environmentally friendly cleaning supplies that help you save time and money?? Look into Norwex sold by my good friend Beth. Her facebook group page is Beth Bork—Norwex Independent Sales Consultant

Ever thought of getting a tarot reading but wasn’t sure of how to go about it or what to ask? My good friend Bretta has her own tarot reading business! Her prices are amazing and her readings (from personal experience and multiple reviews) are precise and accurate! Visit her website and multiple social platforms!
Facebook: Okaasan’s Tarot, Website: www.okaasanstarot.com, IG: @tushiku_chichika

Want to try out LuLaRoe? (This one’s hard! Because I have multiple friends who are consultants but I will #shoutout the two who I have worked with the most and have helped me out, personally) My friends Ryn, and Chrystina are amazing consultants! So many fun fabrics and prints and a large variety of styles and sizes!
FB for Ryn: Lularoe with Ryn
FB for Chrystina: Lularoe Chrystina Cortes

How about makeup and skincare? My super adorable cousin, Nicole sells LimeLight! I personally have only bought the mascara and eyeliner but with those purchases, I can say are amazing products! Her Facebook group is: Nicole’s VIP Limelight Group.

Heard of LipSense? The magical lasting lip color that hydrates your lips and won’t leave them dry! My long time friend, Windy, could probably promote a bag of trash and people would still buy it! She rocks! Her FB page is: Winded By Beauty.

Want more Hot Mess Mom reads? (Yeah, aside from mine). Check out my newfound blogger companion (#teamleo, #birthdaytwins) Regina! She has started up a new blog with a new fire and passion. She would love your support, too.  Her blog is The Hot Mess Brunette. Subscribe and follow her, too!

 

cheers!
ashley

 

#coffeemom

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What is a “Good Man”?

In honor of my husband, since today is his 31st birthday! (Happy birthday, baby!)

I thought I knew what a good man was. Until I dated them for years (God, why?), and finally breaking up with them. If they were really good men (can I really call them that??), I would not have felt relieved upon my breakups. I wouldn’t have wanted to run or find reasons for them to leave me! I wanted them to leave me! Not the other way around. Mainly because I didn’t have the heart to leave. I cannot stand confrontation.

These “men” that I was utterly smitten with, showed me they loved me by controlling me. Initially I was all “Aw, they just want to make sure I’m safe.”, or “They’re really interested in what I’m doing”. No. That turned into “Take pictures of where you’re at/who you’re with so I know that’s what you’re really doing“. And I did it. For years, I did it. I’d leave one relationsh*t, just to [blindly] jump into another one where it starts off all flowers and romance, and being fed sweet nothings that were really infiltrated with absolute garbage, not realizing I deserved better.

Until that’s exactly what I got- someone better.

This man of mine casually made his way into my life. Now, at this point, I had a kid, have been divorced, have serious romantic anxiety, and wanted nothing to do with the male species. Really, when I saw him, I thought he was good looking and told myself “Nope. Not happening”.

Yeah, HO-kay.

We started talking snowboarding and hockey and the next thing you know, there we were on our first date, eating wings (#teambone-in) and falling in love.

He is a good man. Better yet, he’s a great man.

We may not speak the same love language, but we have learned to. He listens to me,  we actually get along, he loves my first born like she is his own, he shows me he loves me, and this list could really go on and on.

A good man will love you at your worst. He will do his best to make things work. He will work hard to make you happy. He will trust you. He will work with you, to make your relationship last, not letting you pull all the weight. He will not pick you apart and want you to change anything about what makes you, you. Lastly, he will not control you.

Obviously boundaries exist. They need to. When you find yourself in situations where the other person is pushing them, mark that as a red flag. Do not settle for less. Find someone who completes you, with a personality that complements yours, not suppresses it. And work hard to maintain your relationship. Not a single one is perfect. Relationships will always require maintenance- and that’s okay! It doesn’t make it a bad one.

Now go out there and find yourself a husband like mine. (Just not mine. =P)

cheers!
♥ ashley

…and for the record! He still says I said I thought he was a douche, when really I said “He looks like a douche.” he’s got some serious RBF. But still handsome nonetheless.

 

#coffeemom

Mom's Corner

“I’m [not] a bad mom.”

Is this something you think to yourself? I do. Daily.

I’m a bad mom.

Today I gave my toddler snacks for breakfast until it was time for breakfast, but luckily for me she was still hungry. Today, I let my oldest have some of my coffee. Last week I yelled at my oldest for forgetting her chores for the umpteenth time.

I’m a bad mom.

Many mornings I just want to lay in bed until the last possible second and then I rush my oldest off to the school bus. “Hurry, the bus is coming”. “Hurry and eat your food, you only have [xxxx amount of] minutes”.

I’m a bad mom.

A few days ago I wouldn’t let my toddler play with the floor vent she picked up from its hole in the ground. Then proceeded to drop an f bomb within sounds’ reach of her innocent ears, as she slammed it on my toes in her fit of rage. [Not at her, just at the fact that it hurt like a mother].

I’m a bad mom.

Some nights when I’m exhausted from working 12 days in a row, when it comes to bedtime stories and back scratches, I skip pages, and fib about how long five minutes is. Then lay my youngest down half an hour early so I can save a little bit of what’s left of my sanity, hoping she puts herself to sleep sooner rather than later.

I’m a bad mom.

Because sometimes Nickelodeon is my babysitter… what makes me even worse is that sometime’s it Spongebob & Patrick.  

But the thing is… if I were really a bad mom– I wouldn’t care. I wouldn’t feel an overwhelming sense of guilt for making my kids sad for telling them “No”. And neither would you.

I’ve come to the point where I’ve realized, frozen chicken nuggets, french fries, cereal, or cheese slices for dinner aren’t going to kill my kids. That turning on the TV to keep them preoccupied so I can get things done around the house (or even just so I can sit by myself for even just a few minutes), won’t brainwash them for the rest of their lives. That disciplining them when necessary isn’t going to traumatize them, but mold them into [hopefully] respectful teenagers/adults one day. Even if that means I feel guilty or get too hard on myself for it because their momentary heartbreak, really breaks mine more.

I feel like I can always do better or I should have done this or that. So I asked my oldest the other day, after getting frustrated for asking her to take her things down to her room for the millionth time (that I ended up doing because she “forgot”), “Are you happy?” She said “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”. The guilt that was weighing on my shoulders lifted from hearing that simple answer. I need to learn to let go of the guilt, not hold onto it and move on. My kids are happy, they are fed, they are well taken care of, and most of all they are loved.

I need to stop telling myself I’m a bad mom. So do you.

I’m not a bad mom. I am a good mom. I can always better myself, but I’m not a bad mom. Neither are you.

 

cheers to us and this whole parenting thing!

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Poshmark + Fashion = Budget Friendly

 

Are you into fashion? But not that into fashion? Like, you really want to be but you’re in a #ballingonabudget type status?

That’s me. 100%.

I looked everywhere looking for the convenience of online shopping without the online shopping prices. Now, don’t get me wrong. I still like all the cutesy boutiques and lulu’s, but with two kids, and the funds I set aside for my coffee, (bills, too, I guess(>.<) ), I can’t always afford to shop at retail pricing.

Then I discovered Poshmark. [← this will take you to my personal Poshmark closet]

Some people automatically think “Ew, I don’t want other people’s used clothes”, (which I am not frowning upon) and others don’t care. I, personally, am on team #idontcare. However,  there are sooo many options for both opinions. There are many people on there who buy wholesale (which you can also do through Poshmark, itself) and then resell it. The perk to that is most closets have a bundling deal where if you add two or more items from the same closet to a bundle, you automatically get a discount (the seller has to have preset this discount on their settingsOR you can also make on offer on said items. Keep in mind that the seller may also have their own set of rules (which is totally acceptable) that they don’t accept offers and prices are firm so just make sure you’re reading their rules before placing offers.

Now for those of you on team #idontcare, or are looking for an avenue to sell or clean out their own closets, you can seriously get some amazing steals on gently used clothing. (There are some iffy people, like many places, who will pull a fast one or sell crap). You can follow name brands, and browse those only, or you can search specific styles and browse people’s closets. There are also many people who are willing to trade! So you can comment on something you like and say  “Hey, would you be willing to trade this for blah blah from my closet” and then you’re still getting rid of stuff you never wear and just trading it for stuff you would wear. Or simply buying gently used clothing for pretty cheap! I have done both, traded and bought and the payment/payout process is simple and easy!

Let me know if you’re interested in either buying or selling! Just leave a comment or email me! I’d love to help you out.

Also, keep in mind these people are trying to make something off their items so please, no low ball offers. #dontbethatguy.

cheers!
♥ashley

 

#coffeemom

Mom's Corner

A Letter to My Oldest Child ♥

S

weet girl,

The moment I found out I was pregnant with you, I was scared. Scared that God had trusted that in that point in time of my life I was ready for you.

Or maybe that I needed you…

That, I did. I needed you.

The second I saw you on that ultrasound screen, everything around me disappeared. (Literally, because happy tears formed in my eyes and fell down my face). I was in a world of my own and while I was scared up until that point- I no longer was. I looked forward to every pregnancy milestone with you. (Even though I was really hoping for a boy 😉 ).

When I knew you were ready to make your debut, and got to the hospital all I could worry about at that point in time was getting you out. The pain I endured during labor with you felt unbearable.

Until you were here.

Everything I read, or learned, or thought I would know about love, left my brain and was replaced with reality. The realization that no book I had read had the instruction manual to figure out what I’d need to know to mother you. The realization that no matter what kind of love I had experienced before you would prepare me for the second I laid my eyes on you. The love I felt for you surpassed them all.

You taught me how to love. You taught me how to be a mother. You taught me new levels of frustration as I’d sit up at night with you not knowing how to take away your tears. You are my first truest love.

Although you now have a sister who needs me just as much, and I watch you with a little jealousy pinging in your little heart. I want you to know, that no matter what, I will love you just as much as I ever have and I will love you just as much until the day I leave this earth, and then some more.

Nothing in this world can take away the love that I have for you. Nothing will ever replace our memories (mainly my memories since you were too little to remember the same things I do). Although, I ache for you to be little again, I love our time now. Watching you grow into a young lady, being a phenomenal big sister, makes my heart swell with pride. I look at you and, without fail, feel such an overwhelming love that I could burst into tears at any moment.

I look at you and I still see the baby, the toddler, the little girl you once were. I look at you and wish I had more time to love you as you were a baby. I look at you and kick myself for the things I wish I would have done differently.

I love you. With every fiber in my body.

You were my first, you will always be my first, you will always be my baby.

Love, Mommy ♥

#thecoffeemom

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Who wants to save money?

I recently discovered Amazon Affiliates and am motivated more than ever to be associated with them. I made a post about saving money on this fancy item 34584059_1968244376541280_4831469764230512640_n.jpg, right here, on my personal Facebook page. With that, I mentioned that I am in a coupon group on Facebook, and ended up adding so many people to the pages I’m on that I became more motivated to revamp my [partially existent] blog and get things readied up. This is where I am hoping to post those deals for you! Keep an eye out and if you’re interested in following the other pages that I am on, I am willing to point you in the right direction.

Continue reading “Who wants to save money?”

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Where do I begin??

Hi guys!

I decided to venture on a new journey and invest in blogging. I have no idea what I’m doing [yetso I’m sure it will be a mess for some time. For those of you who are visiting I figured I’d start off with an introductory entry. So here goes nothing! (or everything)

My name is Ashley, I’m 29 years young, I am a mom of two kids aged 7 and 1, and wife to an amazing man (Matt). I have a very colorful upbringing thanks to the military and have started many new adventures in many places. Japan and Colorado being where I claim “home”.  I am half Filipino and half white, but I mostly get that I look hispanic. *shrug*. I have one sister (6 years younger) who took all the white genes and I took the milkman’s genes. JOKING- Our parents are still together. But seriously, we hardly look alike.

I mainly plan to blog about #momlife , relate-able topics, humor and [eventually] help you guys find amazing deals to make life easier. I am a super sappy person so I will be here to make you laugh and cry and hopefully make this place a happy community! SO drop a line! Say hi!

I am looking forward to this hopefully long lasting journey!
cheers!

♥ashley26733697_1816075671758152_9156675118811461239_n

“When I tell my kids I’ll ‘do something in a minute‘, I’m really thinking ‘please forget‘.” (only half kidding!)